


I Thought I Lost You

by bloodandarrows



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-18
Updated: 2018-02-18
Packaged: 2019-03-21 00:01:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13728783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bloodandarrows/pseuds/bloodandarrows





	I Thought I Lost You

Stumbling across the launch pad, Poe kept his eyes focused on the ground as he desperately tried to force himself to put one foot in front of another. He couldn’t believe it.. Only hours ago you stood before him with that sweet smile on your face, with your hands on your hips as you desperately tried not to roll your eyes at your husband’s silly joke. The ground beneath his feet felt as if it was swaying as the memories replayed in his mind. He felt sick by simply thinking about the explosion, the copper taste rising in his mouth as he bit harshly on his lip to stop tears from falling down his cheeks. “Dammit” he hissed, choking back a sob. With a sharp grunt, Poe slammed his fist against the underbelly of his ship in frustration.

He couldn’t accept that you were gone… That he would never see you wave goodbye before fastening your helmet underneath your chin before jumping in the cockpit of your ship as you prepared for a mission…. That he’d never feel your soft lips against his own as he held you in his arms at night, your body resting against his as you lulled one another asleep with the sound of your breathing.

As the pilot closed his eyes, a sharp wave of emotion overtook his body. A sharp cry fell from his lips, his wavy dark hair hanging before his eyes as he slid down the side of his ship to land into a sobbing crumpled heap on the floor. His body ached from the raw emotion he tried to contain earlier, he didn’t want to cry in front of his fleet… But now… Poe didn’t give a shit if anyone saw him like this. Sat on the floor with his legs pressed against his heaving chest, he just wanted to disappear. As dark as the thought was, he wished that he was the one who got caught up in the explosion instead… maybe that way… there could have been a chance that you may have lived, or that you could have both died together.

“Poe?”.

Running his hands across his face, the pilot whimpered as he buried his face against his knees. No, no, he couldn’t stand to hear your voice. If this was some cruel trick, he didn’t want to hear it. Pressing his palms flat against his ears, he shook his head angrily. “Go away” he hissed to himself, his lips curling up into an angry snarl.

A sharp pain shot up through your side as you clambered down from the rescue ship, the shrapnel from the explosion felt like venom in your veins. Dried blood was caked across your forehead and neck, a violent gash had slit through your left shoulder to the top of your jaw. Various pieces of rubble from the explosion had buried themselves deep into your thigh, the loss of blood made you feel extremely faint and with every step the pressing need to vomit rose in your throat… but the need to comfort your bitterly weeping husband was far greater than any treatment a medical bay could offer right now.

Walking shakily towards him, you hesitantly reached out a hand and rested it on Poe’s shoulder. Like a flash of lightening Poe glared up, grabbing your arm violently and twisting it in an instinctive act of self-defence, which made you cry out in pain. Suddenly Poe’s brown eyes widened at the sight of you and let go of your arm at once. “…(y/n)?” he whispered breathlessly, his throat bobbing as he stared at you in bewilderment. “Hey love” you smiled back weakly, tears prickling in your own eyes at the sight of Poe’s upset. You had never seen his eyes so wet and bloodshot, his lips were swollen and red from the uncontrollable sobs he cried only moments before.

Before you could even gasp, Poe’s arms wrapped around you protectively. Pressing his face against your shoulder, he opened wept, his soft teardrops falling onto your bruised skin. “Baby, oh my god”, pressing wet kisses against your neck, Poe quickly pulled away to cup your cheeks with his hands, pulling your face gently to meet his own gaze. Staring directly at you, Poe’s thumb pushed a strand of hair from your eyes as a sad smile grew across his face. “I.. I thought I had lost you” he muttered, gazing into your eyes like a child first seeing the stars.


End file.
